Maybe it’s a romantic relationship you’re after. Maybe it’s just a friendship. Either way it comes down to understanding how to talk to girls because the first step is always initiating a conversation.
Starting a conversation with an attractive woman is incredibly nerve wracking for most men. But it doesn’t have to be.
Here are some tips for talking to girls that will help you approach and sustain a conversation with any woman.
1. Approach With Confidence
The importance of having confidence when talking to women cannot be overstated. If you want to create attraction, you’ll need self-assuredness, bordering on the edge of cockiness. If you’re nervous and uncomfortable when talking to her, she’ll feel the exact same way toward you.
The hardest part of talking to girls is often the initial approach. According to Psychology Today, the reason many men are afraid to approach is the fact they open themselves up to evaluation in the process. You have to find a way to get over the fear of rejection and adopt a positive attitude so you can approach her with genuine confidence. Check out the Obsession Formula and learn from the world’s #1 seducer, Adam Lyons, if you need help.
Talk with a well projected, assured, and audible voice. Avoid mumbling, stuttering, and whispering as these make you appear insecure. For some guys, pushing and escalating the conversation after a somewhat flat reception is an incredibly hard thing, but the ability to do this is actually a test of manhood and to many women, it is an attractive attribute.
2. Say The Right Things
Once you master the courage to approach, you’ll have to play the game a little before asking for her number. This is where conversation starters come into play.
Some of the strategies that can get you past this stage are asking for a favor (for example, “Please pass me a straw”), making a comment about your surroundings (“I like the coffee here”) or politely asking a question (“Forgive me for snooping, but are your jeans Armani?”). The art of “breaking the ice” is a crucial skill for moving the conversation forward after the first words have been exchanged.
Your ice breaker should be well thought out and appropriate for the situation you find yourself in. For example, saying, “What type of ice cream do you like?” at a funeral isn’t in good taste. You shouldn’t be picking women up at a funeral anyway.
Positive and neutral topics such as music and movies usually have a more lasting positive effect than overly sensitive topics such as religion and politics. Additionally, avoid talking too much about yourself and all your problems. Make the conversation more about her and show genuine concern and appreciation for what she has to share.
3. Maintain Eye Contact
Eye contact is very important when you talk to girls. Where you place your gaze is an important factor in how successful you are at sustaining a conversation. Maintain eye contact when you talk to her. It communicates confidence and shows you are interested in her.
Avoid letting your gaze fall to her body and especially her breasts, legs, and the general waist area. It’s creepy and a turn-off, even if you don’t mean to eye her up and down like she’s some sort of sexual main course.
According to the Huffington Post, some men make the mistake of assuming that a woman is listening just because they are talking. Make sure she really is listening to you. Again this comes back to great eye contact technique and introducing engaging and interesting topics to talk about.
4. Maintain A Playful And Flirty Mood
Keeping a light, playful mood helps a woman feel comfortable when talking to you. Flirting is fun, and it’s a must if you are interested in a romantic relationship and don’t want to be immediately relegated to the friend zone.
Smile at her as you talk. This shows you are having a great time.
Many studies have proven that women are more attracted to men who can make them laugh. Display a strong sense of humor. She’ll love you for it. Just remember, jokes should not be crass, invasive, or demeaning to her. Approaching humor in this way will only paint you as immature and misogynistic, and she won’t enjoy talking to you.
5. Compliment Her Honestly
A discussion about how to talk to girls isn’t complete without mentioning compliments. Compliments are a really nice way to get a girl to warm up to you, but these should be done carefully. Make sure your compliment is genuine; otherwise she may think you are being sarcastic and might get offended.
Men’s Health advises men to avoid complimenting women about their looks because it makes them insecure. Instead, go for something more subtle like her virtue, her presentation, etc.